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I’ve been going over my old posts, here and elsewhere, and it has really amazed me just how much of my writings are of a religious nature. It is a theme that has permiated almost all of my thought life. Even on subjects that have absolutly nothing to do with religion and spirituality, I still have found a way to attach it in some way.

It’s a strange thing to look back on one’s own life, and not recognize it as your own. It’s almost as if a different person had wrote all those things, but it was me. I suppose I have changes to the degree that in a way, I am a different person now. I’m like a child who for the first time realizes that there actually is no such person as Santa Claus. The deep hurt and disappointment, and the fearful uncertainty of a world that I don’t have all figured out anymore has indeed changed me.

With that said, I intend to use SpiritfX as a conduit, a portal for anyone who wishes to – to see inside my mind. I crouch here now on the cold ground, struck down by the fateful blade of reason. I no longer know what the futre holds, for me or anyone else. All I want now is the truth; no matter what that may be. If you so desire, you can discover that truth with me.

The one thing that will never exist on this site again is dogma. All ideas are welcome, but all ideas will be forced through the fierce gauntlet of science and skeptisism. I will know the truth, and damn anyone or anything that finds it’s unlucky self in my path.

Peace and freedom of thought to all!

I know it’s been a long time since I’ve posted on this site, and many things have changed with me since then. For those of you who know me or have followed SpiritfX in the past, what I’m about to say will come as a shock to you, but I have to say it. So, love me or hate me, I must be true to my own self.

I have lost faith in my religion.

The religion that I have clung to, whole heartedly believed, based my life on, fiercely defended, and tirelessly pushed on others… I am now convinced is false. It has taken some time, and much soul (and fact) searching to bring me to this conclusion. The path that I had to take to bring me to where I am today was one of the hardest things that I have ever done. It is a long story and I will write it, but for now I must simply make my stand.

I believe and have damn good reason to believe that Christianity (and all other religions for that matter) are completely and utterly not real. I believe that they are a fantastic mixture of myth, semi-true events, and outright lies designed to control and passify the “unwashed masses” of humanity.

To make a long story short; whatever self-reinforcing mechanism that was drilled into my gullible mind when I was indoctrinated, is now broken. It took one serious slap in the face of a life event to break it, but it is without a doubt broken. I have woken up out of this religion induced dream, and now I think I can finally see the world as it truley is: a place of hard, cold reality, but infused with hart-stopping wonders that make it all worth it.

I am happy to be alive, and to be living the life that is unique to me. I will do my own thinking from now on. I will love my fellow man and be a good person, absent the fear of punishment if I don’t or the greedy expectation of a reward if I do. I will do the best to make this world a better place for those who come after me, and no longer be concerned with the imminent apocalyptical return of a deity. I will love my fellow human beings and this wonderful world for what they are and what it is. I will be free!

As for this web site, I haven’t decided what I want to do with it, so for now I will leave it up. I need a place to share my thoughts and feelings in the days to come.

For those of you who I have bashed, made fun of, and tried to harass into seeing the world the way that I once saw it: I am truly sorry.  I know this is no excuse, but I really was under the influence of a mind altering substance, namely the bible. I cannot change what has been said or done in the past, but I give you my word that in the future things will be better.

Until next time.